Well, of course, you are.
But instead of the 1984 squad of Dan, Bill, and Harold, who Answers The Call ? The 2016 ball-busters: Melissa, Kristen, and Kate.
So, this is the face of feminism. Not even the supernatural is safe from political correctness run amok.
Gender diversity: A celebration of mediocrity, sucky sequels, and spinning box office gold back into straw.
But then… gender confusion isn’t about inclusion, but exclusion. Men.
If there’s a fire in your neighborhood.
If something’s flaming and it don’t look good.
Who ya gonna call?
Gender nonspecific firefighters!
Not firemen, of course. There ain’t any. Firemen have been extinguished from the snowflake sanctioned lexicon.
Firefighters could be men. But… probably not. More than likely they’re fireguys or firedudes (think skinny jeans and Birkenstocks).
Just as all Men In Black aren’t men. MIB is a title worn like a badge or fireman’s hat. Y’know… inclusive. Something gender benders supposedly clamored for. Loudly.
But the very notion of being fashioned from Adam’s rib… the pink pussyhats would rather be thought of as descendants of chimps. Which would explain a lot.
They’re unhappy with being women, unable to be men, and hate men for it. More to the non-binary point: If they can’t be men, men can’t be men either.
Gender neutral persons created He them. Genesis 1:27
NKJV (as in Not the King James)
Where’s the virtue in breaking down barriers? Some are, like… important: Baby gates, pool fences, The Wall. And societal guardrails keep wanderers out of cultural ditches.
Boys will be boys. And they need their own space to spit, burp, and fart. To be boys. And to discover that girls are not.
Real women understand this. And men (or rather guys) too timid to speak up become male cheerleaders.
[Jeopardy music plays softly]
Answer: Effeminate acrobats, lady zebras, gorillas trimmed in pink. Question: What do the NFL and the circus have in common?
a. Being a man (a real man), or…
b. Planting the token female six feet under?
A man should play football.
His best gal should stand on the sidelines and cheer.
What is liberalism but a denial of consequences?
For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction: Whatever transforms women into just one of the guys, also turns men into ghosts of their former selves.
Instead of cackling, “I ain’t afraid of no patriarchy!” women should demand men be men. Or at least pretend. And they could help by letting men wear their own pants. And fire helmets. And proton blasters.
But first they would have to admit that they are not men, and embrace the beauty of their creation. And Creator.
Feminism is an apparition. It’s about chasing equality and finding nothing but sameness.
Enraged, the broom-riders blast away at male privilege, macho stereotypes, and anything that undermines the sisterhood of the pink pussyhats. In the end, womyn are left with nothing but empty shadows.
Only the ghosts win.
Jeopardy! Millennial Edition
The Electoral College has no students. Because… The Electoral College is not a college. So, like… no White Privilege or Feminist Equality studies?
The One on the Right
But (to ad-lib an old line) a living Constitution is a dead Constitution, and an undead Constitution is a Constitution for zombies.