Herding Cats

The ancient Egyptians enslaved Israelites unleashing the wrath of Almighty God. But they worshiped cats.

Perhaps they understood, unlike our modern pharaohs… nobody owns cats.

Dogs have owners
Cats have staff
(…or so says Mittens’ embroidered throw)

Cats are Bed & Breakfast boarders at best. They dine any time, nap anywhere, and purr beneath the moon to a Patsy Cline tune. They are self-grooming, self-governing, and always socially distant. Cats are the cowboys of the La-Z-Boy frontier.

Dogs are democrats.


But even with the lifting of medical martial law and dog owners dancing naked-face through the aisles of lettuce and grapes, everyone’s just a little too delirious with their refunded freedoms to see… we’re not as free as we used to be.

Well, what was the mask mandate but a human leash law?

No gatherings other than Sunday dinner, all workers reclassified into essential vs. non-essential based on their ability to fulfill the needs of the State, and of course you couldn’t go to church, but you could burn one down.

Businesses closed
Travel suspended
Churches shuttered
No right to speak, worship, or assemble

And for refusing to wear your muzzle… No soup for you!

To borrow a bumper sticker: Covid control wasn’t about Covid. It was about control.

…Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of “Hey, y’all! Watch this!”

Everyone remembers the highlights, but Jefferson’s Declaration also warned of the threat to freedom beyond just Pharaoh:

“He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers from the EPA, IRS, and OSHA to harass our people…”

So, we went to war with an unelected unaccountable King and his powdered wig bureaucrats for the right to be ruled by our unelected unaccountable neighbors and their lapdog democrats.

Apparently we lost.

Free men do not ask permission. Or forgiveness. And we’re either free or we’re dogs on a leash. Freedom cannot be licensed.

How many men are driving suspended, not for being bad drivers, but for being bad fathers? (Not that a license could transform Mr. Magoo into Mario Andretti but…) if a license, any license, can be revoked for shorting child support then what’s next?

Failure to fly the crayola flag?
Denial of a patron’s personal pronoun?
Singing Jesus Loves Me?

Tyranny is an zero-sum game: If the tyrant cannot control everything, in the end he  controls nothing. The ultimate failure of every evil empire is their inability to herd cats.

If the State therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed. Unless, of course, a permit is required then please file your forms in triplicate.
John 8:36  NKJ (Not the King James)

Freedom and bureaucracy are oil and rust.

For tyranny to succeed, individual liberty must be surrendered to the selfish whims of everybody else. And everything must be licensed by the State. Except cats.

Just kidding.

It’s just that cats, unlike the rest of us, refuse to be enslaved by Pharaoh.

Jefferson’s self evident truth declared freedom to be an inalienable gift of the Creator. Mittens understood this from Day Six. The rest of us… eh, we’re still unconvinced.

Gone Fishin’
Everyone knows the fish are missing, everyone knows why the fish are missing, but no one is allowed to ask what happened to the fish.

Sons of Liberty
Be careful what you wish for. To borrow a bumper sticker quip: Covid-19 control isn’t about Covid-19. It’s about control.