Blue Plate Special

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A taste of Americana: The Blue Plate Special was not only satisfying and nutritious, but for two bits… affordable.

But diners have since wandered away to the All You Can Eat buffet. Not because they were really hungry, but to eat more than they could fit on their plate while depriving others of the same.

Dietary justice isn’t about satisfying the hungry “From each according to his ability, to each according to his need” but punishing those who got for the pleasure of those who got not.

…which is the whole purpose of our gotcha tax code – to restore some mythical equality out of inequality by taxing unequally. But reams of tax code later, we are unequal still.

Even flattening the menu into a single rate, the rich (suckers) would still pay more for benefits they would never ever use, than those sopping-up those benefits… for which they could never hope to pay.

“Diversity (of color and culture but not of income) is our Strength” …or so goes the bumper sticker.

Equality used to mean equal treatment by the law not because of the law, including an ‘even-steven’ tax code. But if that is still our ideal, we are a long way from home.

Our Constitution’s Head Chefs believed everyone should pay the same. Not the same rate…

The same amount.

But their original recipe 𝐀𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐥𝐞 𝐈, 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐈𝐗’𝐬 “one tax fits all” was democratically overthrown by Marx and Engels’ 16th Amendment: Gourmet for me but not for thee.

Of course, if diners actually had to pay out of pocket for everything they ordered, they’d never drool over someone else’s plate.

But the sinful and the selfish want it all, someone to pay for it all, and the law to tilt the table their way. The purpose of the law then is to take what they could not obtain without  the law, and provide what nature (and nature’s God) failed to supply. And in the process declare them morally justified.

“If righteousness comes by the Law, then Christ is dead in vain.”
Galatians 2:21

The ground is level at the foot of the cross.


Level Ground
We bless the Father and give the finger to our fellow man, then wonder why Dial A Prayer goes straight to voicemail.

Let’s Eat Grandma
Hold up on that blue haired buffet, we need a quick powwow with the shoot eating panda.

R is for Redskins

Not for rose. But what’s in a name?

A shadow vaults a fortress wall then steals silently through a forbidden grove to the castle of his enemy. On a moonlit balcony unaware, a fair maiden appears. She speaks:

“O Melvin, Melvin, wherefore art thou Melvin?”  Melvin & Juliet – Scene 2 Act 2

Of course, Shakespearean purists will be quick to critique: Juliet wasn’t asking where Melvin was but why he was.

Melvin.

…which he wasn’t.

To thine own self be true but his one true love hated his name though not him, or so she claimed. So, was it any wonder that her romantic misplay “Refuse thy name!” ended in tragedy.

What’s in a name? Would an overall’d farm lad straw hat and cap gun, sneak into a Saturday matinee double-play featuring Marion Morrison in Soggy Oatmeal followed by Not Jane Russell and the Rather Harmless Man?

That’ll be the day, pilgrim.

If a rose were an elephant, would you really want a dozen? What if they were Redskins? or what if Moses supposes his toes were roses… ♬

Opinions ain’t a Hollywwood musical. In a free society, All the world’s a stage and offending someone is inevitable, maybe necessary. The First Amendment not only protects free speech but guarantees unpopular speech, which begs the question…

Amendment XXVIII: What Right doth Thou have to be Offended?

Constitutional arsonists defiantly deny the downright declarations inked in the Bill of Rights, insisting on silly stuff like… you can’t yell “Fire!” in a crowded theater. But what if there is a fire in the theater? or worse, what if there are…

“Redskins!”

Or what if you just need some devious diversion to rescue other hapless husbands from an evening worse than shakesperean death (…which might be preferable once they’re all discovered down at Mel’s Grill & Ale with a wench in one hand and a pint in the other.)

But with a charred wonderbra in one hand and a nutcracker in the other, society’s Juliets set out to cancel everything that offends them – everything that is not them:

Columbus day
Chik-Fil-A
The Dukes of Hazzard

And without the consent of the fans of Major League Baseball, the Cleveland (no longer the…) Injuns now suit up as dreaded Guardians – door-t’door insurance salesmen striking fear in the hearts of harried housewives everywhere.

What a bunch of pussies we’ve become.

But blinded by their own contempt, the unhinged pink pussyhat brigade failed to also censor the home of the franchise formerly known as the Redskins (a name which is actually older than the team itself) which honors the original white male himself – the one and only redskin-fighting Father of our Nation.

Guess now they’ll hafta move.

The Cowboys will be next – soon to be rebranded as The Beta Male Livestock Managers, followed by the Tampa Bay Semi-Aquatic Wealth Redistributors.

Approved rules package for the new NFL season:

• No tackling without permission
• Quarterbacks will be uniformed in pastel pleated mini-skirts
• Half of winning score differentials credited to each losing un-winning team

…resulting in – you guessed it (and fractions).

The woke League ought to grow a pair and recoin all their teams according to the fantasy protocols found in backroom bars and poolhalls. Something like…

Flaming Rat Breath Snot Nosed Puss Picking Belly-Button Lint Lickers.

…or the new Jets. (Oh, c’mon – this is football: Wear a helmet!)

If changing your name doesn’t change your identity but you change your identity anyway, maybe you should just go ahead and change your name: The National Hm-hmm League – yet another Shakesperean tragedy.

Yeah… the truth hurts.
The truth nobody wants to hear is hate.

But names don’t hate. Hate is not a logo, a monument, or a flag painted on an orange car. Hate is heart issue – yours. You are what you see in others. And when everything you see is hate, hate is everything you see.

So there can be no Redskins, no Dilbert, no Blazing Saddles – not until the closed fist is replaced by an open heart…

The Golden Rule
a few Beatitudes
and Love thy Neighbor

The ground is level at the foot of the cross.

Juliet may have been right about one thing: The Redskins by any other name will still be smelly.


X is for Christmas
If your neighbors accused you of being a Jesus freak, would there be enough evidence in your seasonal display to convict?

Dear Diary
Day 1: Hello, I must be going! I cannot stay, I came to say, I must be going… ♬