The Haunted Schoolhouse

Screaming at the screen doesn’t help.

The innocent always wander into the dark and scary shadows unaware of the despair waiting there. Lured by the temptation of educational equity and free lunch, they disappear (sometimes all day) only to emerge witless shells of themselves howling at a TikTok moon.

Scooby-Doo 101: To solve the mystery, solve the crime.

CSI begins with a one desk fits all warehouse where education goes to die – curiosity coated with indoctrination, critical thinking erased by cultish dogma, and independence deadened from complacent submission. Yeah, the dungeon masters preach diversity, but then squeeze tiny bodies and minds into freakish uniforms in their experimental laboratories.

Till finally, devoid of any competitive workplace (or academic) skills, the brainless zombies are graduated into villages of the darned with degrees in:

•  White Men are Evil
•  The Graveyard of Capitalism, and “Zoinks!”…
•  Witches, Warlocks, and the Founding Fathers

Oh, sure… pro-choicers can always escape to some horror-free haven, but they’d have to scare-up the admission fee themselves – in effect paying twice: Out of pocket tuition on top of un-rebated school taxation, which is spirited away and never seen again. Along with their souls.

Trick or Treat: Is school choice the solution or just a clue?

Nothing else is run this way. Would anyone let the straw-brained Internal Revenue scarecrows take their grocery dough then tell them where to shop and what to buy?

Money should follow the little monsters wherever they lurk: In town, out of town, out of state.

After all, we expect their mummies to make other life-altering decisions, why not education? If they can pick out a fright-lite video for family fun night, certainly they can figure out the least possessed schoolhouse in the neighborhood. Not to mention that an empty class here or there would help expose problem areas (…which is also why not).

Of course, you’d think choice meant you actually have one, but you really don’t. Not unless where and when also includes to go or not to go – that is the question. Otherwise, one episode ends the same as another. And the nightmare continues.

Sure… you can make pack the tykes off to 𝐌𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬, 𝐈𝐧𝐜. but can you make them think?

Truancy laws dissolve the authority and responsibility of parents. The creature must obey its master – if not mom and dad, then the state. Compulsory attendance is imprisonment and public schools nothing more than juvenile detention centers. (Kids serve life so parents can return to a life before kids.)

There is no education without free will.

The cruel reality is changing schools like changing channels doesn’t actually change much. A cast of fresh faces in new roles and different places will still be haunted by the same ol’ ghosts.

…minus any celebrity guest stars (outside of drag queen story hour).

To be frightfully frank, it doesn’t really matter how school choice is cooked-up, it’s all just so much witch’s brew without its most gruesome ingredient: Customers. And no, parents are not customers.

Neither are the goblins. But the goblins make the rules because they rule the money. So, your choice is theirs.

Parents are nothing (…except in the way).

Which exposes another Halloween prank: Why are the childless paying for the non-existent to sit in invisible desks?

Well… if the goblins can make you go, and make you pay to go, then they can make you pay even if you don’t go. So…

 What is public education but legalized theft?

Die Hard: Welcome to the party, comrade!

“𝐅𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐞𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐠𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐧𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐥𝐬. 𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐬.”
    𝐓𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐡 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐤: 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐌𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐨 𝟏𝟖𝟒𝟖
    (𝐊𝐚𝐫𝐥 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐱 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐆𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐜𝐡𝐨)

Poker pros have this notion: When you sit down at the table and you don’t know who the sucker is – it’s you. Well, did you take a good look around your remote-learning kitchen table? The shutdown/lockdown was never about Covid. It was about control.


To ghost-edit Dostoevsky:

We lay freedom at their feet and say: Make us your slaves but feed our kids gender neutral environmentally sustainable rainbow affirming Scooby Snacks.

Free men are citizens. Subjects are zombies. 𝑹𝑰𝑷

The Giggling Green Ghosts  …Ruh-roh!

…were just the sideshow. Before the credits rolled on Saturday morning’s cartoon lagoon, the villainy apparitions were always unmasked to reveal the devious minds behind the crime:

•  Public Unions of the Ungrateful Dead
•  Ghoulish Tenured Teachers, supported by…
•  Proud of My Little Demon Minivan Moms

Free for all education (which isn’t free and costs more than if it wasn’t free), Soviet bureaus of propaganda, and trick or treaters sacrificed to the goblins of convenience. Yeah… there’s your crime.

Oh, Scooby-Doo! Where are you?

Wasted Days and Wasted Nights
The goal of education is to obtain a diploma, not an education. The diploma is needed to pay for the education. The education is not.

Flintstones of Bedrock, USA
The whole purpose of language is communication. Something we’re not doing. Oh, sure… everyone’s talking. But no one’s listening.