One For The Gipper

A newly-minted politician wandering down an avenue of marble monuments pauses at a travel agency poster: Round The World Cruise $99.  He walks in, the agent conks him on the head and tosses him in the ocean.  Another politician out for a stroll notices the same advert.  He walks in, the agent conks him on the head and tosses him in the ocean.  Bobbing up and down in the rolling tide, the first inquires, “Do they serve lunch on this cruise?”  To which the other shrugs, “They didn’t last year.”


Tax cuts or spending cuts – before, after, both, neither?  Ship-out a class of like-minded swabbies and you wind up with a slew of opinions on where to set sail.

Supply-siders want to hack taxes, not because it’s not their money, but to put spurs to the GDP.  A quick kick in the uptick will not only balance the budget but also rein in some runaway debt, making spending cuts unnecessary.

The deficit hawks want to force the federal force to make do with fewer paperclips, which will be but a mere annoyance.  And a solution in search of a problem.

…which is not the bureaucrat but his reason for being.  Before a man burps, poops or farts, he must first obtain permission then afterward file an environmental impact statement.  Thomas J’s Declaration noted that the King had …erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people and eat out their substance.  New king, different flag, same ol’ pirates.

Yeah, there are too many in the wagon and not enough pulling the wagon.  But it’s the air bags, mileage requirements and mindless add-ons mandated by a ship-load of alphabet soup agencies that make the wagon weigh too much and cost too much to go westward-ho.  And the wheels are flat.

Nothingness is what government produces, of which taxes are the fuel.  So, the question is not what to cut but what not to cut.

The Gipper once quipped, the nearest thing to eternal life is a government bureau.  The burial of which takes slightly longer.